Tag: #sinatra

I might throw up on Martin Short.

I might throw up on Martin Short.

Well, I was un aware until today that Mr. Short, aka the sexiest man alive, aka my hero will be in New York the same week as me again this year doing a book signing. I honestly had no idea. I am planning a visit and have tickets to see the Broadway production of Misery with Bruce Willis and while looking for other things going on in the city while I would be there I stumbled upon a book signing. I of course bought tickets to the Alan Zweibel in Conversation with Martin Short at the 92nd Street Y and OMG it says there is a book sale and signing after the show.

Now, to calm myself down. What am I going to say? Am I going to freak out? Will I pass out?  Will I be able to breathe? What if I break out in terrible acne prior to?

Should I shake his hand? Oh god, the thought of his hand in mine is to much to even think about. I cant shake his hand. But what if I approach the table to have my book signed and he extends his hand first? What do I do then? Ill have to shake his hand right. Ill throw up. Oh god don’t let me throw up on Martin Short.

Should I dress up? Should I wear my I love Ed Grimley shirt?  It clearly says I love Ed grimley across the boobs. But then Martin Short would look at my boobs. What if they aren’t up to par?  Ohhhh Maybe he will sign the shirt?

And now, what do I say to him? Do I just stand there silently and let him sign and walk away? Do I tell him I love him and that I run a Martin Short fan blog and instagram and twitter that no one looks at but me? Do I say “Hi, I loved the book.” and see what his response is and then wing it from there? I cant wing it. I’m a bumbling idiot at that thought of being next to him.  Ill need a script.  Ill have to write on my hand what I need to say. This will more than likely be the last time I am ever near him.

I think I will say “Hi, How are you”  followed by his “hello” Then I will say “In your book you talk about meeting Frank Sinatra and how you told him he had no idea, no concept of how huge a fan you were, that is this moment for me. This is a story my kids, and grandkids will be told over and over until I die. You are my Frank Sinatra”

what do we think? Can I utter those words to my hero?

60 yr old woman trapped in a 34 yr old body

60 yr old woman trapped in a 34 yr old body

Today was a very nice day here in Kentucky. Weather was perfect, and I was driving around downtown with the windows down and the radio blaring. I got some strange looks every time I approached a red light however. I guess I don’t look the part. I was in fact caught at a red light singing Frank Sinatra “If you let me love you, its for sure I’m gonna love you, ALL THE WAY”

what’s so strange about this? Why does this warrant stares from strangers? Everyone sings in the car. I’m weird about my music. I like music that means something. I like lyrics that I can relate to.  I have a wide variety of music on my playlist actually. If I were to hit shuffle, and just let it run you would bounce around from Frank Sinatra, to Lil’ Wayne and then on to some Jerry Lee Lewis. I like the older stuff, from the 50’s and 60’s. I cant help it. Even country music I don’t like anything recent. Il take some old George Jones over Luke Bryan any day of the week.  I feel odd that I mentioned Lil’ Wayne, let me go on record and reiterate my previous statement…. I like Lyrics. I like things I can relate to and every now and then this 34 year old white girl from Kentucky can relate to something Lil’ Wayne has to say.  For example, when Im having a rough day I can turn him on and

” Ok you want me up in a cage then ill come out in beast mode. Got to world up in a safe, combination is the G-Code, This Wheezy Mother F****er blood ganging Im in bleed mode, all about my dough but I don’t even check the peep hole, so you can keep knocking, but wont knock me down. No love lost, no love found” ….. I can relate.. Im all about my dough too Lil’ Wayne.

But then there are the times, more often then not that I am calm and romantic and longing for love. Real true, ALL THE WAY love that Frank Sinatra sings about. Times like today when this 34 year old woman gets crazy looks for singing to the wrong era of music at stop lights.